What they say |
What They Mean |
| Yes | No |
| No | Yes |
| Maybe | No |
| I'm sorry. | You'll be sorry. |
| We need | I want |
| It's your decision | The correct decision should be obvious by now. |
| Do what you want | You'll pay for this later. |
| We need to talk | I need to complain |
| Sure... go ahead | I don't want you to. |
| I'm not upset | Of course I'm upset, you moron! |
| You're... so manly | You need a shave and you sweat a lot. |
| You're certainly attentive tonight | Is sex all you ever think about? |
| Be romantic, turn out the lights | I have flabby thighs. |
| This kitchen is so inconvenient | I want a new house. |
| I want new curtains | and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper..... |
| Hang the picture there | NO, I mean hang it there! |
| I heard a noise | I noticed you were almost asleep. |
| Do you love me? | I'm going to ask for something expensive. |
| How much do you love me? | I did something today you're really not going to like. |
| I'll be ready in a minute. | Kick off your shoes and find a game on TV. |
| Does my bottom look fat? | Tell me I'm beautiful. |
| You have to learn to communicate. | Just agree with me. |
| Are you listening to me!? | Too late, you're dead. |
| Was that the baby? | Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep. |
| I'm not yelling! | Yes I am yelling because I think this is important. |
Return to The Kerb